Strap Ons & Harnesses

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What are Strap-Ons?

Put simply, a strap on is a type of couples sex toy that allows one partner to penetrate the other. They are a two piece sex toy consisting of a wearable dildo attached either by a harness, or underwear, for use during sexual intercourse.  There are also strapless strap ons which are held in place by a vaginal plug. There are many different types of straps ons but they are usually a dildo style toy that can be either phallic or non-phallic.

Strap-on sex has taken the world by storm and it’s easy to see why when you understand what joys these simple sex toys can bring. So, for those of you who are new to this craze, let us give you a basic rundown of your orgasmic options:

Strap-On Dildos

A Strap-On Dildo is designed to be worn, usually with a harness, during sexual activity. They can be used for both vaginal and anal intercourse. A strap-on dildo provides exciting opportunities for all kinds of sexy fun, from power-switching play, to pegging. Not forgetting, steamy same-sex sessions.

Phallic or Non-Phallic?

When it comes to the dildo part of the strap on it can either be highly realistic, otherwise known as phallic or it might look nothing like a real penis; non-phallic.
When it comes to choosing which strap on to buy, all strap on dildos can be grouped into phallic or non-phallic. So which one will you choose? Well that all depends on what turns you on.

When a Penis Doesn’t Turn You On

The primary function of any sex toy is to excite you sexually, so if you don’t get frisky looking at the perfect specimen of manhood then a penis shaped strap on dildo is not going to get those pulses racing.
Our gender and our sexual identity are a huge part of who we are. And there are plenty of people that simply don’t get excited by seeing a whopping great penis. If you are one of these people then we are guessing a strap on penis is going to do little to excite you. In which case take a look at the non-realistic dildos. They combine all the satisfaction and fulfilment of penetration without a specimen of manhood in sight.

Non-Phallic Dildos also offer a wider range of styles and colours as they are not constrained by the need to replicate the human body. They are often far more colourful than realistic strap ons making them a great choice if you are expanding your sex toy collection and just fancy something a little different.

Hollow Strap-On Dildos

Perfect for penis owners; Hollow Strap Ons can be used whilst both flaccid and erect. Using a hollow strap-on during sex enables you to have a strong, long-lasting erection ensuring both partners enjoy the moment for a long as they need to get total satisfaction. Hollow Strap-Ons can be used as a penis extension giving you a bit more length and a bit more girth. Because who doesn’t enjoy an extra helping! They are also a super aid to erectile dysfunction, taking pressure of you and allowing you to continue having intimate physical relationships.

Strapless Strap-Ons

This one is just for vagina owners. The shorter end is worn inside the vagina, whilst the longer end is used to penetrate the other partner. As a result, a strapless strap on will give you have all the fun of a strap-on without the straps and without the harness. Using a Strapless Strap On can provide a more intimate experience as there is nothing in the way during your play.

Strap-On Kits

To penetrate or be penetrated? That is the question! Whatever the answer, Strap-On Kits have everything you need to get started opening the door to the exciting world of hand-free pegging, role reversal and power play. A strap on kit will usually include an adjustable harness and a harness dildo. Most harnesses have an O-Ring at the front, to which the dildo is attached. Dildos can usually be changed using the O-Ring so you can use any harness compatible dildo in your collection, keeping things fresh and exciting.

Vibrating Strap-Ons

A Vibrating Strap-On is possibly the ultimate strap-on. Why? Because they come with the added excitement of vibrations. Vibrations are delivered into the shaft meaning both the penetrator and the penetrated get the thrill of another dimension of sensation. Top tip – if you don’t have a vibrating strap-on or dildo, try adding a stretchy vibrating cock ring to the dildo instead. Pop it over the top, roll it to the base and hey presto…an instant vibrating strap on!

Realistic Strap Ons

A realistic strap on is pretty much a strap on penis. They are shaped and textured to feel and look like a real penis. And just like real ones, these dildos come in every size, colour and shape. Choose from a small strap on to big strap ons. 

Who Can Use a Strap-On?

Literally anybody can! It is a common misconception that only lesbians use strap ons but thanks to porn this has become a stereotypical view of these toys. And whilst many happy lesbians are enjoying the delights these dildos bring, so are many other couples.

Vagina owners may use them for exploring penetration play with their same sex partner.

Heterosexual couples may use them to explore pegging. Penis owners may use them as an aid to to erectile dysfunction or as a penis extension to add more length and girth.

Strap-ons enable anybody to experiment with different penetration sizes and girth, adding a new dimension to your sexy time. All things considered, these simple toys are quite simply a must have whatever gender or sexuality you are. 

How to Use a Strap-On

Before you get down and dirty with your new strap on its best to get used to it first. Wearing it about the house will help you get comfortable with how it feels and how it moves so when it comes to showtime you can be confident and sexy.

Like any other sex toy, you will get more out of using your strap on with a partner if you are already comfortable with it beforehand.

Practice first. Try thrusting on your own before playing as a couple. It sounds silly because surely we all know how to thrust, after all we’ve all had sex so what’s the difference. Trust us there is a big difference. Thrusting with a strap on is very, very different. Practice will let you experiment with how to move your hips, how the dildos moves in the harness and how the harness feels against your body.

If you’ve not tried strap on play before then its best to start with some basic sex positions first. Try lying on your back whilst your partner rides you. Sitting in a chair while your partner straddles you is also a great position for newbies. And when you are ready the ultimate power position has to be doggy style!

Top Tip – try grinding. Thrusting in and out is all well and good but strap ons are great for reaching those G-Spots and P-Spots. These sweet spots react best to pressure rather than pounding so grinding can result in a deeper, more intense orgasm.

Talk to your partner. Communication is key so talk to your partner whilst you play. Questions such as “How does it feel?” “Is there something you want me to try?” or “Is that deep enough?” will ensure you both get as much enjoyment as possible from this intimate experience.

Hygiene is Hot – If you’re going to switch holes maybe anus to vagina, or anus to mouth then clean your dildo in between. If you don’t want the fuss of cleaning, use a condom and change it every time you switch.

Lube

Regardless of what hole your strap on is diving into, you are going to need lube. There are no rules about which lube to use but if you are indulging in anal play then an anal lube will be best and if you have a dildo made of silicone avoid a silicone lube.

Safety First

Before you begin agree a safe word. A good safe word is something that can’t be mistaken to mean something else. Fruits such as Pineapple or Kiwi, make great safe words as they cannot mean anything other than what they are. A safe word is the word we use to say stop I’ve reached my comfort limit. When the safe word is used all parties agree to stop instantly. Having a safe words in place means we can still role play and be kinky with language such as “No” or “I don’t like it” without any confusion. This builds trust between partners and ensures everyone is happy and comfortable with the sexual activity.

Have Fun

Don’t forget to have fun. Strap ons can feel and look a little daft to begin with and that’s fine. So have a giggle, enjoy the moment and share in the laughter. Because let’s face it, if you cant laugh during sex, you probably aren’t doing it with the right person.

How to Use a Strap-On for Solo Play

These marvellous sex toys are not just for sharing with your partner. Much like a suction cup dildo they are perfectly capable of getting you off without the assistance of another body. Simply strap the strap on to a chair, a coffee table, a couple of pillows or even the headboard.

Best Sex Positions For Strap on Sex

Missionary

Possibly the easiest; the receiving partner lies on their back whilst the penetrating partner is on top. Mix it up by having the receiving partner legs up in the air. The penetrating partner can support if needed. This elevation gives another depth for a more intense sensation.

Doggy Style

Most of us are familiar with this one as it’s great for G-Spot and P-spot stimulation. The receiving partner is on all fours whilst the penetrating partner is on their knees inserting the strap on from behind.

Standing Doggy

Similar to doggy style only standing up. This is a great position for those wanting to assert a little more dominance.
Mix it up by having the receiver bend over furniture such as a desk, the kitchen counter or the side of the sofa.

Spooning

One for the romantics. Both of you lie on your sides, this could be on the bed, on the sofa or even a big fluffy rug in front of the fire. The penetrating partner behind the receiver. This position enables lots of cuddles and intimacy whilst you play.

Common Strap-On Questions